Leaving Winnipeg following the Bison Classic track meet, the same feeling I after the last few weekends hit me – happy to put together decent performances but certainly leaving a lot to be desired. Out of necessity (but also cause I really enjoy it), I compete a lot in the individual events in the early season. The last weekends have looked like Edmonton – Portland – Edmonton – Montreal – Winnipeg, for individual event meets.
It is necessity or my approach because performing high quality pent reps is difficult in Canada. We are pretty isolated from the heart of the sport. It is also a gift though that we are able to be a part of the individual event meets and I really try to take advantage of it. I approach it as if it is high quality training and when I’ve had success with these pre-season meets, I’ve had success in the pent season. Obviously though, I always want to win. It’s hard to accept losing to anyone, especially in the moment of battle. I sort of adopt two different personalities – the one that knows this is to prep me for the season, and the other one that in the moment expects to be the best. That’s audacious and doesn’t work out too often. Haha. But it’s what I go with. I ran pretty mediocre in Winnipeg. The goal here was to get solid times as opposed to approaching from a tactical standpoint of placing well. I raced three events within 24 hours (4x800m, 1000m, 1500m), so not conducive to racing fast times. I guess I’m greedy wanting all that. In terms of putting good times down, I more or less failed. The positive I can take away is that I ran some tactically good races and I got a lot of racing volume.
When I keep bumping my head against the wall a number of weekends in a row, moonlighting as a different athlete, I feel blessed despite being totally humbled by those at the top. In moments of pause, I question it though. It’s emotionally hard to consistently compete if you are emotionally invested in each contest. So, I have to kind of fool myself and pump up before and during, but after shrug it off and not let the emotional highs or lows set in. A funny balance. One of my coaches said once that you can only go to the ‘well’ so many times. Which is so true. I’ve witnessed some athletes pull off out-of-their-mind performances that were 90% heart. But one can’t rely on that tactic. Gotta save it. So, another great, fun, and beneficial weekend of competing… but not completely satisfying. I think I avoided the well and for now, that’s what matters.